November 16 - 22

Sadly, confusion and procrastination are large factors in my life. Mainly in school. Today has contained a lot of it.

Have you ever had that feeling that impending doom is certain, then all the sudden it's taken away? If not, consider yourself very very lucky. That exact thing just happened to me, 5 seconds ago. This sadness, gloom, self-pity was due to procrastination and confusion. Oh, where shall I begin...

Math homework. Contain your screams and shudders, I know what kind of thoughts this brings. BEWARE: The following sentence is not for the faint of heart. Now think of math homework when you learned something new from a sub and it makes no sense whatsoever. I know, it's bad. That blank worksheet is staring you in the face, taunting you, so you shove it back in the folder, waiting to face it. That's me. I could have, should have done my math homework days ago. I've had it since Thursday, yet here I am on Sunday night with hardly a single problem done. Procrastination and confusion ruining my life again. Not that this procrastination and confusion wasn't my fault. Still, it sucks. And still, I'm here procrastinating some more, having just finished Star Trek (good movie by the way, totally recommended).

I am sitting here writing this at 10:15 pm Sunday night because of my lack of time. Hey, on the bright side, I answered the discussion question on Friday during English when I finished early. GASP! I finished something early!? I know, very strange. Also, I have not read a single book required for Honors English or finished my essay. Or even started, for that matter. I'll admit it, no confusion in factor here, just my unwillingness to face what I don't want to.

Now, referring back to the beginning and the feeling of certain death: Musical applications. I thought they were due tomorrow, then was told they were due Tuesday, then thought they were due tomorrow once again, and was reassured they are not due until Tuesday. Feel free to reread that sentence to wrap your brain around it. Do you have any idea what my sleep cycle is like right now and how much I need my sleep?! By the way that last sentence is written, I feel it needs no further explanation. Just know that I am tight-rope-walking the fine line between sanity and not-so-normal. I could be in bed right now if I had just gotten to it. With the musical application, I should have found out for sure, therefore cutting out the confusion. Plus, I could have done it weeks ago when I got it, therefore not needing to be confused because it's already done. Too late now, why look back to the past? Because you regret your actions... But I digress. Now you know how close I am to falling off this rope and plunging into insanity. I can't even write 500 words without going loco.

If I had just thought about things and acted upon what I thought was best, I could be in bed right now and my mother wouldn't know the asylum's telephone number. Confusion and procrastination: I blame you. And myself. Whoever's fault it is, the moral of the story is to figure things out and get it done. Thank you, and good night.